Kelly's Bridal Shower (and a ukulele tangent)

Did I tell you about the bridal shower I hosted for my friend, Kelly? Don't lie to me and tell me I did, because I know I didn't, and you're only saying I did because you don't want to hear about it. Too bad, sucker!

This was the easiest shower I've ever planned, but we all had a great time! I invited the ladies from work and a couple coworkers' wives. I reserved the back room of a bar that's near the office on a weeknight, immediately after the office closed. I ordered drinks and appetizers. So far, so good. No cleaning and no cooking!

Just in case things got out of hand, I thought it would be best if we all remained anonymous. Therefore, I prepared fake name tags for everyone. Kelly's said Olive Tyler because she's in love with a guy named Tyler. And she's going to marry him! Everyone else got to choose their own. (I left off a couple raunchy ones because I try to keep it real classy here.)

• Anita Bath
• Barb E. Dahl
• Carrie DiBabi
• Crystal Boll
• Emma Royds
• Gaye Barr
• Helen Back
• Iona Braugh (real person who went to college with my Aunt Claire)
• Marsha Mellow
• Mary A. Richman
• Missy Sippy
• Paige Turner
• Peg Legge
• Sharon Weed
• Summer Love
• Wanda Kiss

Then we played a few games. First we did a Purse Scavenger Hunt. On the back of that page, we used crayons to draw the bride and groom. The winners of those two games won traditional shower prizes...Halloween decorations!

The last thing we did was play a game called Fortunately/Unfortunately. It's a good travel game my mom taught me. She's a fun person to travel with! When I was little, we took an annual seven-hour car adventure to Ponto Lake, Minnesota. Remember when I wrote about the lake here? One of the best things about the trip was that my musical mama would bring her trusty ukulele and several copies of her 25-page camp song sheets. My mom typed the song sheets on a typewriter and had them mimeographed at the library. Until one sweet day in the 80's when my dad got a deal on a copy machine that took up half of our our den. Anyway, we would sing our little hearts out in that Oldsmobile. I remember people looking at us as we drove by, and I remember thinking they must be wishing they were in our car. At the end of each song, we would flip through our song sheets and shout out the number next to whatever song we wanted to sing next. After a couple hours, my dad would say "That's enough!" And then my brother would take a nap in the back window and my sister and I fought over who got the seat and who had to pile pillows and bags on either side of "the hump" to make a comfortable place on the floor.

My dad and I were the night owls in our family, so I usually stayed awake with him while he drove. A lot of times he would let me sit on his lap and steer. We played a game to see whose eyes were better, and whoever was the first one to read roadsigns was the winner. My dad always won, but I think I could beat him now. One time I was sitting on my dad's lap in the middle of the night, and he used the steering wheel to explain the solar system to me. That was pretty cool. I decided that some day I would teach my kids about the solar system when they were sitting on my lap steering the car. But then someone came up with a few safety laws, which is the main reason my kids don't fully understand the universe.

WHERE WAS I??? Oh, yeah. We played Fortunately/Unfortunately at Kelly's bridal shower. We all took turns telling the story about Kelly's wedding day. I started the game by saying, "Fortunately, Kelly woke up on time on her wedding day." The next person said a sentence that started with Unfortunately, the next person's sentence started with Fortunately, and so on. Make sense? It's actually a pretty fun game.

Oh, I forgot to tell you about the decorations! I kept them elegantly simple to go along with the sophisticated feel of the shower. I printed pictures of Kelly and Tyler and put them in the bathroom.

Kelly with one of the pictures in the bathroom

P.S. A few months ago, I saw an advertisement for a Uke Circle. It's a thing where ukulele players get together and jam. I called my mom immediately to see if she was interested, but she just laughed. Maybe now that she has DG (Dollar General) sunglasses, she thinks she's too cool for her uke. And then she reminded me that her uke is at the cabin in Minnesota. I may organize a special Uke Circle up there as a nice surprise for her. At her cabin. I think she would really like that surprise, don't you?

Fashion Update

Here's what I wore to work yesterday.

This is another great example of work pajamas. Click here if you don't understand what I mean by that.

Also please notice that I still haven't found a decent pair of black heels to wear to work. Click here if you also don't understand that comment. (Seriously, you should go back and read my archives...there's some good stuff there!) Ok, this should be fun. Guess which shoes I wore:

A. The Party Girls (too high for every day use)

B. Last Year's Party Girls (ugly and uncomfortable)

C. My Old Favorites (about-to-break-off heel, and no, I still have not thrown them away, get off my back about that)

D. My Really Old Favorites (very, very well used and are different heights since the sole came off one heel)

E. My Latest Attempt (made for someone with a shorter foot and longer toes)

F. All of the above.

tdtdtdtdtdtdtdtddt (that's a drum roll) It's D. My Really Old Favorites. :)

If you "got" both of those references without having to click on the links, I thank you very much for being a faithful reader of this little bloggy.

P.S. My Aunt Betty, who is awesomely funny, told me that she almost always wears bracelets because someone told her that bracelets make you look thinner. Never mind that the lady who told her that was selling bracelets. I say it can't hurt! Oh boy, can you imagine how athletic I will look next time I wear a bracelet with my super high heels. I hope people recognize me!

P.P.S. If you ever go to Weight Watchers, do two things at your first meeting. First, wear heavy clothes so you have the potential to "lose more weight." Second, wear heels or at least sneakily stand on your toes when they measure your hight. Your goal weight will be based on your height, so the taller you are, the higher your goal weight can be. You have to be sneaky because they're used to seeing tricks like that.

P.P.P.S. Here's another fashion tip to make your legs look tan in a picture. Let your leg hair grow out just a little bit. Use caution because if they're too hairy, they will look hairy in the picture. Also, please make sure you're not going to sit near anyone or go out in the sun on those days. If you do forget that your kid has a soccer game, and you find yourself sitting in the sun next to another parent you've been trying to get to know, pull your skirt or shorts down over your knees and (this is the most important) KEEP YOUR LEGS TUCKED UNDER YOUR CHAIR. Not that I've personally been in that situation...ok, yeah. I've been in that situation a few times. Oh, and don't waste your time zooming in on my picture to check out my leg tan because I made sure the resolution is too low for you to see any details. :)

That's all.

I might be a stalker

TJ and I started noticing a very artistic van around town about a year ago. We see it so often that we started taking pictures of it and texting them to each other. It's been a fun way to connect! A few of my coworkers have gotten into it, too. I deleted most of the pictures, but here are some that will help you understand why its so easy to spot.

Favorite hangouts: Barnes & Noble, 4th Street downtown, Hy-Vee, Goodwill and the Crossroads mall area.

We hadn't seen The Van in a couple months. But on Friday, TJ texted me with big, big news. The Van has been painted! The Van Guy sometimes comes into the gym where TJ works out, but oddly TJ has never seen him actually work out. On Friday, The Van Guy showed up at the gym, but The Van had a face lift! TJ sent me a picture, but I'm not even going to post it here because it's mostly covered by the sign that was on the window between the camera and the van.

And then yesterday TJ took me out to lunch. It seems that good things always happen when TJ takes me out to lunch because I got to see The Van with my own eyes! TJ drove around the block so I could get a good photo. I admit that I often have to drive around the block or parking lot for this purpose. It's the thrill of the hunt.

The Van was on my side of the street, so I was too close to get the whole thing in the frame. The orange stuff is tape, and it appears to be a work in progress. It looks like an abstract horse. Or it could be a landscape with mountains and river. Or maybe lightening. Any other good guesses?

Let me defend myself before you go calling me a creepola. I don't go out looking for The Van. It seems to anticipate my whereabouts and places itself in my path. It's almost like The Van stalks me. I find it hard to ignore. Anyway, a van like that probably likes the attention.

I'll keep you posted on the transition of The Van. I'm sure I'll see it around, and like you, I'm looking forward to seeing the new artwork!

A message about facial tattoos

TJ and I don't get to go to lunch with each other very often, but he had been telling me he'd found a new place. He kept the details a secret and finally had a chance to take me last week. It wasn't what I expected, but it was great!

The city of Waterloo received a grant from Vision Iowa to renovate the downtown river area. They have built some beautiful things, including an amphitheater, plaza for a farmer's market and extensive landscaping. A building called Public Market was also part of the project, but I hadn't paid much attention to it. That's where TJ took me to lunch. It's a co-op market for local producers to sell all kinds of foods. Here's a link to their website.

The reason TJ took me to Public Market is that they have a hearty lunch buffet for $5.99! They had Monte Crisco sandwiches, lasagna, chicken alfredo, cheeseburger casserole, etc, etc, etc. Most of the people there were older retired folk. The kind of folk you would expect to support the wholesome goodness of a co-op market. The kind of folk who teach Sunday school, babysit their grandchildren, and meet for coffee. You know what I mean. But there was one guy who I couldn't stop glancing at. He was clean and dressed normally. He wasn't doing anything unusual, just sitting at a table quietly eating his lunch. It was the tattoos that completely covered his face. I'm not phased by most tattoos, but I admit that I am bothered by tattoos above the neckline. Here are some thoughts that were going through my head.

• Those tattoos have completely altered his face to the point where I can't even imagine what he'd look like without them. Was he so unhappy with his face that he wanted to cover it?
• He must not be worried about getting identified in a lineup. So maybe that means he's not a law-breaker.
• What does he do for living? How would he get through job interview?
• What does his mom think? And his grandma? Does his grammy have a picture of him on her fridge to show her friends?
• Are any of the people here at the Public Market afraid of him?
• Is he uncomfortable in a setting like this where no one looks like him?
• I hope he doesn't notice me looking at him. Is it more obvious to look at him or to avoid looking at him?
• Maybe he wants people to look at him. I bet people stare at him a lot.

And then, a few hours later...Coincidence? When I got home from work that same day, my own daughter had a facial tattoo.

And the next day at work, I was invited to help deliver some storage storage cabinets to a tattoo shop. Well, guess who happened to be the owner of that tattoo shop. The guy who I had seen all the way across town at the Public Market! He was easy to identify because of the facial tattoos. And he was very nice. I didn't tell him that I'd seen him and had been pondering his choice of artistic expression. 

It is as if I am being given a message not to judge the facial tattoo. Sigh. I'll try.

Free Pop and Tampons

I sincerely appreciate two things that my office provides free for employees. Pop and tampons.

Even as a grown woman, I don't want to be obvious by walking from your office to the bathroom with your whole purse. At my daughter's junior high, the girls use pencil pouches. Oh man! I hope I didn't just blow their cover! Hopefully in a generation or two, girls will stop caring about who knows when it's their time, but as for my generation and those before me, we go to great lengths to conceal it! In other offices, I hid a tampon in my sleeve, pocket or waistband. If I were stopped on my way to the bathroom by a coworker, I would pray that the tampon wouldn't slip out of my skirt's waistband and fall at my feet. If that were to happen, my plan was to quickly step on it.

The other free thing in my office is pop, or soda to all of you who aren't from the Midwest. I went through a phase where I said soda because I admit it does seem like a better name for a beverage. But then I decided not to hide who I am, a full blood Iowan, so I'm back to saying pop.

So yeah, we get free pop, Gatorade or green tea. We all appreciate it very much and don't abuse the privilege. However, I do break a couple rules that are related to it. First, there is this sign on the recycle bin.

BWAAH HA HA! I NEVER rinse my pop cans. I used to rinse them if there was someone else in the kitchen watching me recycle, but I don't even do that any more. I took a quick office survey to see if everyone else rinses their cans. I only made it around to one other person, and Kelly doesn't rinse her cans either. I do shake them out, which I feel is a good compromise.

Here's what's sitting on top of our recycle bin.

Clever little cardboard houses for our pop tabs, which will be donated to the Ronald McDonald House Foundation.

I used to not take my tabs off because of a bad experience helping with a pop tab drive on my college campus when I suffered from some painful finger cuts. But then I found out a lady in my office goes through the pop cans before they are recycled to remove any tabs that got missed. That's what you call dedication to a cause! I have perfected my technique and take my tabs off.

I'm a fan of the Ronald McDonald House, and I have actually stayed there. But you know what? Those two cardboard houses have been sitting there for about a year and are only filled up to about the grass. I'm sure we'll get enough tabs to get to $5 or so worth of pop tabs in another couple years. I wonder how much it costs to print and distribute those cute little houses and how that compares to the value of the average number of tabs each one brings in. Huh. Well, I'm done wondering about that because I have other things to wonder about. Do you ever tell someone that you wonder about something and then that's the first and last time you ever think about it? I do that all the time.

Ok, now for the BIG rule I sometimes break when I'm mad or frustrated at work. You know how sometimes it just makes you feel better to break a rule, right? I grab a free pop and quietly approach a certain door in the back corner of our office, away from all the offices, cubes, and heavy foot traffic.

I open the pop and walk around in the room that clearly states "Absolutely no liquid in this room!" I've never spilled, and it really does calm me down because I feel like I've gotten some sort of revenge.

OK, I admit it's not as crazy as you might think. That that room used to house servers and still has that funky raised floor. But now our servers are in a different locked room, and this room is just where we keep our signs and literature. The weird thing is that the actual server room does not have this sign on the door. I also wonder why they keep the server room locked when there are only 15 of us here and our whole office is locked at all times. Maybe our IT guy knows there's a chance I might go in there with an open container of liquid. A very good chance.

Joking Around in the Office

Kelly and I like to joke around with our coworker we’ll call Steve. His real name is Steve. He’s not on facebook or any of that social media stuff, but he asked me not to use his last name here. Otherwise, I would tell you his last name and his mailing address.

The shenanigans started with Kelly’s Wall of Wow!

Please contact me if you have additional photos of Steve. They're not easy to come by, and we hope to continue building the Wall of Wow!

One day, Kelly and I received an awesome deal from Sears Portrait Studios for a free sitting and portrait. We somehow got right in the next day. I'm sure they were completely booked, but happened to have a cancellation. It was a pretty fun photo shoot because the professional at Sears made us feel like real models. We asked her for ideas for cute poses, and she suggested one of us lay down on our stomach and the other lay on top. We opted not to do that. In the end, we split the cost of a $5 frame and had a nice little present for Steve.

Another time, we put a picture of Steve on a stick and I took it with me to England and France. When I got home, I showed a presentation in a staff meeting that included these pictures.

 

I'll end with a few quick Steve stories. All true.

Once upon a time, I was playing a Bags video game with Steve at a work event. People started getting jazzy with the initials that would appear on the back of our shirts when it was our turn to play. I put ANN and someone else put something like BAD. Steve put STD. He was thinking stud, but anyone who has taken health class in the last 30 years knows STD does not stand for stud.

Once upon a time, Steve tried to open his hotel window, and he messed up his finger. After several weird contraptions, surgeries, and physical therapy sessions, he still can't straighten it. He says it's not a big deal, but it's annoying when he's trying to put his hand in a pocket.

Once upon a time, Steve saw a homeless man outside his office window struggling to bring in a fish he'd caught in the river. Steve went out to help him pull it in. See the fishing net in the pictures above? It was taken the day Steve met his homeless fishing friend, Larry.

Once upon a time, Steve managed a guy who started wearing women's clothing to work and changed his name to Lisa.

Once upon a time, Steve got a really good deal on some high end roller blades. Unfortunately, they were for racing, and Steve was unable to slow himself down.

Once upon a time, Steve called into a conference call when he was in a dentist chair.

Once upon a time, Steve and I were travelling for work. I went to my room and sat down to make a phone call. Then Steve came right into my room! We were both confused for a second until we realized the hotel had made an error. We got it straightened out right away. Since then, I've accidentally walked into two other rooms at two other hotels where people have been inside. It's always awkward, whether you know them or not. And that's why you always use the chain and deadbolt, people.

Once upon a time, Steve was late to work because his cows got out. One especially confused beast went to the school and had to be shot down by a local sharpshooter. It’s the kind of thing that sometimes happens to Steve.

The Pajama Loophole

I discovered a way around business casual. I wear clothes that pass for business casual, but are comfortable enough to wear to bed. That means no khaki pants and no fitted button down shirts. Instead, go for soft cotton skirts, dresses and tops. If an outfit is especially casual, pair it with an extra fancy boot or shoe. Also always wear earrings in order to appear more put together. For example, here's what I wore today.

Work pajamas

If I had wanted to dress it up, I might have added a scarf, but it was good enough for today. There are only 15 people in my office, so it's not a big deal. Sometimes our building gets chilly, so on top of wearing pajamas, I also keep a blanket at my desk.

Another day...another PJ.

Today, after going to work, chatting to the school secretary and guidance counselor, going to the orthodontist, and grabbing a sandwich at Subway, my daughter asked me why I was wearing two different earrings. Oh, dang.

It's surprisingly difficult to take a photo of your own earrings.

You know how kids these days wear two different socks? Well, it's kind of like that, only it's not cool and it's not done on purpose. I once wore one navy and one black shoe to a conference I was attending in San Jose with a new boss. They weren't even the same style of shoes. In my defense, I was pregnant, but of course that was another thing I was hiding from my boss. Another morning when I was pregnant, I threw my cell phone in my purse. But when I got to work, I found the house phone in my purse. Not so helpful. Oh, and another time when I was NOT pregnant, I was at work and realized that I was wearing TJ's black dress pants. And I got compliments on them. True story.

But do you want to know something funny? My mom came to a soccer game on Saturday and asked me if I like her new sunglasses.

Nice bling, Mom!

Very nice! I asked her what the DG stands for. Mom said she didn't notice that part when she bought them. (WHAT?) And she thinks DG is for Dollar General. Ha! I'm sure these glasses have been flying off the shelf, what with everyone being so proud to shop at the Dollar General. Who's with me in wanting to rock some DG sunglasses? If we ALL start wearing them, they'll become cool. Kind of like those rubber bracelets that are all the rage. Head out to your local Dollar General store. DG rules!

P.S. I'm so pathetically unaware of fashion that I had to rely on my buddy, Google, to find out that the DG glasses are supposed to be a knock-off of Dolce and Gabbana. But I'm still saying it stands for Dollar General.

Going Batty!

Is it too early for a Halloween post? I say no! I have a simple Halloween decoration idea that's thrifty and makes a big impact. Hoot! Hoot!  I can understand why bats are Halloween animals because they're kind of scary. But why owls? I guess owls are the Native American symbol for death, but in general, I don't think most people are scary. 

I do love owls and even drew one on my extremely artistic magnets - here. But THIS post is not about owls. It's about bats. Not real bats, but cute Halloween decoration bats. Bats have never bothered me, but they do bother a certain man that lives in my house. I'll tell that story another day.

See how cute these bats are on my funky green wall?

It's Easy!

• Trace a store-bought bat decoration on black poster board and freehand smaller bats, making the most of your poster board. They don't have to be perfect!
• Cut out the bats and slightly fold the wings so they are a little bit 3D. (That ought to scare the pants off somebody!) 
• Attach them to any wall with masking tape. Masking tape is the nicest kind of tape to use on your walls, especially if you don't plan on repainting after Halloween. Position them so it looks like a whole colony of bats is flying up and away. 

After you have your bats up, plan a party, and invite me!

Potty Princess - Attack of the Chihuahuas

How many of you love Taco Johns? All of you, that's who! There is a Taco Johns conveniently near my office that I visit whenever I need a quick taco. It's on Laporte Road in Waterloo for you local folks who are interested in visiting. Most of the employees are older ladies who take their job seriously and are noticeably friendly. I thought they deserved a treat today!

Enter: The Potty Princess!

I wanted to stick with a Mexican theme, even though Taco Johns is only Mexican in an American sort of way. Have you noticed that you don't see too many Mexicans in Taco Johns? At least not in the one in Waterloo. Side note: Last week I went to a hibachi restaurant where the Japanese chef makes a big show of cooking on a hot grill in front of you. Our chef's name was Fernando. And he didn't have too many tricks up his sleeve.

Back to Taco Johns. I printed out pictures of ceramic Chihuahuas and placed them in 5" x 7" frames. Thank you very much to my friend, Alisa for donating the frames! They fit nicely in my purse, along with some Command hooks that won't damage the walls. Bah-dah-bingo!

Here are the images I used. You're going to want to scroll down because they are just precious!

I think this is a cookie jar.

This is for sale on ebay.

This poor pup has super short front legs.

This one is pure genius and appeals to nearly everyone.

Oh! And the most exciting part is that I sent my kids in to check on the bathroom 8 hours after I decorated it, and the pictures are still there! Success!!

To the nice Taco Johns ladies: 

You're welcome for your surprise!

Much love,
The Potty Princess (P.P.)

P.S. Here's a link to the first adventure of the Potty Princess. 

Mrs. Fuzzy Toilet O'Topper

This is how the potty started. Earlier this year, I stopped by a Kentucky Fried Chicken in Madison, Wisconsin on my way through town. In the bathroom, I saw this.

Do you see the fuzzy toilet cover on top of the toilet? I named her Mrs. Fuzzy Toilet O'Topper. Here are some of my unanswered questions.

• What thoughtful person followed through with bringing Mrs. Fuzzy Toilet O'Topper to KFC and place her on her throne?
• I can't remember the last time I saw a fuzzy toilet topper. Do they even make them any more?
• Is she sanitary? How is she cleaned? (She didn't look clean.)
• What is her purpose? Are you supposed to put your purse on her? Is she merely a decorative focal point?
• How long has she been there?
• Why is she the only piece of luxury in the bathroom?
• When employees clean the bathroom, do they make a conscious decision to keep her in place?

After taking this picture and thinking about the above questions, I started noticing other public restrooms where people were going the extra mile. I'll share more pictures in another post. And please, if you have them, send me more. It eventually led to me decorating my first public restroom...see my post called The First Mission of the Potty Princess.

Well, last week I happened to be driving through Madison around lunch time. I decided to check in on my old friend Mrs. Fuzzy Toilet O'Topper. I was giddy as I entered the restaurant and headed over to the restroom. Guess what! It's been SEVEN MONTHS, and look! She's still there!

She's a little cockeyed, but Mrs. Fuzzy Toilet O'Topper is still hanging on!

She's a little dirtier. But I guess that shows she's being used...for something.

Mrs. Fuzzy Toilet O'Topper was dangerously close to the flusher, so I was careful not to touch her.

I should be going back through Madison in a couple weeks, and I have formulated a plan. Stay tuned!

WANTED: One Perfect Pair of Black Heels

Lately, TJ tenses up whenever I point toward a shoe store. He tries to say calm and asks, "What are you looking for?" He knows I'm looking for black heels, but I say, "Oh, I don't know, I'm just looking." Or I say one of the girls need shoes. Because if I tell the truth, TJ will remind me that I already have black heels. He's right. I do have black heels. But I still one more pair.

He reads this blog, so I'm going to make my case. Here are the five pairs of black heels in my closet.

Let's meet the candidates up close.

 The Party Girls

I bought these recently to to wear to bachelorette party. I was worried they would hurt me after an hour, but they held up all night! The heels on these shoes are pretty high for me. The benefit is that the added height me look extremely slender. Like crazy skinny. :) The drawback is that I can't walk as well as I would like to. Skinniness trumps the ability to walk in certain social events, but not for every day work shoes. They are not black heels that I can wear to work on a regular basis. Unless someone wants to give me a foot rub every night. No? Ok, then I need different black heels to wear regularly.  

Last Year's Party Girls

I got these shoes for $5 at Target a couple years ago. They pinch and push too much of my toes out the front. And see how the heel curves back under the shoe? It's like the designer was attempting to fool the eye into thinking the foot is smaller than it really is, but it looks weird and isn't very stable. You can have these shoes for free if you wear a 7 1/2 and are willing to ignore my warnings. They're like new, barely worn!

My Old Favorites

I loved these shoes! I wore them so much that the heel is breaking away from the shoe. I keep them because I haven't found a good replacement. The last time I wore them, I walked around on the balls of my feet so I wouldn't totally break off the heel. Now that I'm writing this, I see how crazy I sound, and I will throw them away. I promise.

My REALLY Old Favorites

As you can see, I also loved these shoes. They're rough, but I actually still wear them every once in a while. I'd prefer a slightly higher heel, no frayed seams, insides that aren't pulling out, and most importantly, a sole on the bottom of both heels, not just one. Ever since the sole fell off one of the heels, I stand crooked in them, but I don't think people really notice. They're bad, but I'm not going to throw them away quite yet, until I have a better option.

My Latest Attempt

I was excited to find these cute shoes for $10. I am willing to pay up to $15 for the right pair of heels (yeah, my cheapness is a major part of the problem). The total length of the shoe from my heel to toe is perfect, it's the in-between that's messed up. The shoes are made for someone with a shorter foot and longer toes. You would not believe how uncomfortable that makes them. So uncomfortable that I've worn My Old Favorites and My REALLY Old Favorites in order to avoid them. I will keep them as a reminder that I need to find better heels. On the bright side, I think shorter toes are much cuter thank longer toes, so it is a boost to my self esteem. Kind of like when you lose weight and love wearing your baggy jeans. The looser they get, the more uncomfortable they are. Even though you have to keep pulling them up, you feel awesome in them! You walk around all cocky, trying to make them look as baggy as possible. But then you see a picture of yourself in the baggy jeans, and you realize you don't look thin, just sloppy. And then you don't like your baggy jeans any more. So then you're looking for a great pair of jeans for $20 or less and a great pair of heels for under $15. It's exhausting! Except right now my jeans are as tight as could be, so it's just the shoes I need. I'm not going to try to lose weight until after I find the shoes. I like to take one step at a time. Oh boy.

Yeah, I know...one of my weakest posts ever. If this is your first time reading, it really does get better!

Gene Simmons Still Rocks!

I was about 10 when my teenage cousin, Mike, showed me his new KISS record. I had never heard anything so...terrible! I didn't understand why they wore makeup and I thought they were evil. Mike smiled and told me that some day I would like them. I absolutely did not believe him, but he turned out to be right. I was never a super fan, but I did have a couple KISS cassette tapes in high school.

I dressed up as Gene Simmons for the Central College leming race. Students elected a Grand Leming, dressed up and ran behind the Grand Leming across campus and into a pond. A few years later, TJ and I wore "Simmons Family Reunion" T-Shirts to a Halloween party. I was Gene again, and he was Richard! I've always wondered if Gene and Richard are distantly related. Does anyone know?

I spent most of last week at meetings at a hotel in Milwaukee. Half-way through the afternoon, this image floated by the windows behind the presenter. It was hard not to be a little distracted.

Then it drove by the window about ten more times throughout the afternoon.

The bus was sitting in front of the hotel when we got back from dinner, so we were checking it out. Some detective in our group noticed the California license plate and deduced that it was legitimately connected to KISS and Gene Simmons.

Then the bus driver came over and asked if we wanted to look inside. That was the second best offer I'd had all day, the first was the stuffed churro I'd had with lunch! The bus driver sells guitars at KISS concerts. Even though it wasn't exactly Gene's bus, it was pretty interesting.

Terrible picture of me driving the Gene Simmons bus

And I saved the best picture for last.

Bridget, Wendy, Angelia and ME (on the right) in 1994.